Decisions

How do you make decisions? Do you weigh the pros and cons? Do you sprint full-steam ahead hoping everything just works out? Do you question what might happen if you choose otherwise?

We make decisions every day and every hour. We are always narrowing down what to choose, what we think, what we eat, who we love, and what we believe.

We know we can’t decide everything at once (it’s impossible, or just ridiculous… like wearing your entire wardrobe!)

And, if we don’t decide, that is also making a decision. Like deciding not to get out of bed—well, now I’m not eating, drinking, so eventually I’ll die unless I decide differently or someone comes to help. Even “not deciding” is a decision.

All decisions have consequences. Every decision we make is narrow.

So, then why are we so concerned with narrowness?

Sunday, we learned that the question beneath the question of “Is Christianity Too Narrow?” is ultimately about “Who gets to decide who’s in and who’s out?” And this decision impacts a variety of interlocking areas like salvation, hell, heaven, God’s love, God’s favor, etc. (see Resources below)

·      Do we have to decide?

·      Do I get to decide? Do you?

·      Does the Church?

·      Does God?

Our question “Is Christianity Too Narrow?” arises from two major extremes of Narrowness, one in the Church and one in our culture.

The first reason Christianity appears narrow, is that the Church historically has fluctuated in her own negative ways of policing external rules and regulations. We literally appear narrow-minded to the world around us by having a moral system, but often using that system in a way that grieves the nature of human relationships. We violate the person by importing our morals. We offend the intuitions regarding love to change someone’s external actions.

There’s a humorous testimony by John Wimber (who started the Vineyard churches) who went from a secular musician in the 60’s to a new believer—and he narrates what it was like for his family to first visit a church. The unsaid expectations are funny, but partly because we church-goers know we live inside unspoken moral rules.

Video: John Wimber’s First Visit to a Church - Baffled at the Unspoken Expectations – Funny!

And what Wimber’s experience highlights is not just how different the culture has become—but also how unaware the Church is of our expectations and rules for others. There’s a variety of extremes in this box sometimes called “legalism” or “moralism.” From indulgences and inquisitions, to concerns about what you wear, to what music you listen to, to what you say. All this seems strange even hurtful to a culture that hears “Jesus loves you,” but then sees our looks of disapproval. Dallas Willard calls these “Gospels of sin-management.” In these, we manage ourselves and others, rather than coming to God as we are. This all appears narrow-minded because it neglects the heart—even those outside the Church can see this.

 Another reason Christianity appears Narrow is that we live in a culture steeped in Relativism. What is Relativism? It is the belief that truth arises from inside the individual. That the individual is the only sole source of truth.

This is where phrases like “my truth,” “speak your truth,” or “it doesn’t matter what you believe as long as you’re a good person,” get tossed around. These phrases are good in the sense that we’re welcoming and validating someone else’s experience as important or significant, but they're misleading us if we say they are accurate portrayals of what is ultimately True. This is where a whole host of cultural conflict arises.

For once someone contradicts “your truth” with a “my truth,” or an “what is our truth?” we’re at a stalemate of how to proceed. And it’s usually the one with the most power (whether that be popularity, celebrity, “likes”, followers, applause, or appeal) who creates an unspoken moral rule. And there’s no way to say, ultimately, if that thing is right or not. And we have total permission to self-contradict the rules because the moral system arises from within myself. This works while we all play nice, but it doesn't work if we decide to stand up against any type of injustice. There's no reason to condemn a Nazi if they're only doing what they think is right.  

Further, in these sorts of situations, Relativism can also paint a picture of anyone who has a moral “right-way” as narrow, intolerant, or judgy. Morality, for some reason, seems wrong to a Relativist, but there’s no reason a Relativist can say why. For to say why would expose Relativism as a decision within a moral system (based only inside the individual). But the Relativist refuses to look at their own system because they believe no system should be imported from the outside. And the fact Relativism it is a system with values outside itself (for example: the only truth you can know is your own—which is a statement of ultimate, not personal truth), admitting this would be self-contradictory. It would be obviously hypocritical. 

Most popular Relativists don’t even realize that this is their value system, since by its nature, Relativism denies that there are value systems outside of “me.” And to expose this is by its nature confrontive. For the Relativist is convinced they don't have a system, and that those who have a moral system are oppressive, intolerant, closed-minded etc. The conflict then bounces back on the confronter because it appears that their overtly moral system is being imported on the non-moral Relativist (who is actually unaware they're in a moral system). 

This is a pain point for many people in the Church and in culture, because as questions grow in intensity around certain moral-lines, those topics become red-hot, burning all who touch them. The reason is, we’re not talking about the question behind the question. We’re not talking about the different moral systems we’re using, and deciding which one is best for the person, for culture, for the Church, etc. Nor are we asking which one is truth. Instead, discussions around these topic becomes more and more heated, creating waves of newsworthy conversation, but conversations that ultimately never get resolved. 

And it’s even more painful when these sorts of issues rise in our homes, our families, our friendships—for with Relativism, we cannot disagree, we cannot have another perspective outside of the Narrow line of the individual. And so though we’re together, we’re more and more isolated, because we’re living in separate universes.

When the Relative value system is expose, confusion and anger rise, even between people who really care for each other. For Relativism doesn’t want to be seen—it in fact lives on the permission to be yourself without being “seen” at all. Seen implies eyes from the outside. Seen implies judgment. However, seen, in the Christian story, also is the only route toward real love.

It turns out that Relativism is, like every other decision we make, a Narrow view itself. We cannot not decide. And we can choose to believe it all, but we need to recognize that Relativism (and all its types, like pluralism, polytheism, pantheism, etc) are a limit on those who believe one thing, one way. It is a decision against narrowness. Let’s level the playing field here—all decisions are narrow. But “too narrow”? Well that implies a value system outside of oneself equally as narrow.

Relativism causes everything but itself to sound “narrow.” For if the individual draws the line, it automatically includes everyone ,who we agree with and excludes everyone we disagree with. It may sound kind or tolerant to say “well, that’s just what you believe, and that’s fine for you,” but we need to equate that with "there is only one truth",” and "my way or the highway,” for in essence we’re saying the same thing. To agree with the Relativist is to abandon one’s own worldview. Those inside Relativism get to say “everyone is in,” while at the same time not saying, “but everyone’s out who doesn’t agree with the line in my perspective.”

Here’s the brief video clip I showed on how Relativism.  Dr. Timothy Fortin briefly covers how Relativism ultimately separates and cuts-off relationships, communication and intimacy, that only increases our relational wounds. Relationships, intimacy, and love actually need a moral line outside of ourselves.

This is where Christianity becomes so profound

Christianity is beyond any moral system or world religion, because it doesn’t just draws a line of good/bad, wrong/right—but flips this on its head by welcoming in those who are hurting, failing, struggling, wounded, tempted, etc..

The Person of Jesus both validates a heavenly morality waaaaayyyyyyy higher than we could ever attain (“Be holy as I am holy”—woof!) aaaaannnnnddd also takes all of our offenses, wounds, and sins into Himself—not just validating the wrong-ness of them—but actually healing them in His love.

Jesus’ sacrifice points to our relational wound and repairs it. By His wounds our wounds are healed.  By the love of His sacrifice, the immorality in us is restored, and we are able to come into the embrace of the Father again.

But all this hinges on one very important detail…. is Jesus really God?

Can a human be divine?  Does Jesus really think He’s worthy of worship?  Is He really demanding that we follow Him completely?  And can little humans like us actually be like Him?

That’s our next big question. You ready?

 _______________________

Resources

Articles

Hell, the Nemesis of Hope? – What are the views on Hell? Can we really reconcile a Good God who punishes people for eternity? If you’re asking these questions, this is a great way to think more deeply about Jesus—the One who talks so much about this uncomfortable stuff!

Hell, Discipleship, Evangelism & Salvation with Dallas Willard, a Conversation – A rich, brief resource on the threads of issues as we look at the Narrowness around us within Christianity, in the culture, in ourselves, and also some amazing insights into God’s heart, into Jesus, and into the Christian journey.

Video

Professor on Relativism, Communication, and Love – The video from Sunday’s sermon, as Dr. Timothy Fortin explains how without a common reality there can be no common truth and no true communion between people. The nature of relationships requires a standard outside of ourselves, which points to the possibility of Jesus as the answer to our moral needs and the way into true love.

Film

After Death Documentary – In Theaters Now – Free Tickets Available (click here) – a gripping feature film that explores the afterlife based on real near-death experiences, conveyed by scientists, authors, and survivors. From the New York Times bestselling authors who brought you titles like 90 Minutes in Heaven, Imagine Heaven, and To Heaven and Back, emerges a cinematic peek beyond the veil that examines the spiritual and scientific dimensions of mortality, inviting viewers to contemplate the possibility of life after death.

Hellbound? - a feature-length documentary that seeks to discover why we are so bound to the idea of hell and what our views on hell reveal about how we perceive God, justice, the Bible and, ultimately, ourselves. This is a faith-based film but also helps us to ask deeper questions featuring William P. Young, the author of "The Shack".