Wrestling with God This New Year

Dear High Street Family,

The time between Christmas Day and New Year's Day has always been somewhat sacred to me.

In a sense, we’re between celebrating the birth of baby Jesus and also the birth of a New Year.

All of the momentum of December, all of the meaning of Advent, suddenly has some space to breathe after the festivities…

And, naturally, I begin to reflect.

·      What has this year brought?

·      What memories stand out?

·      What do I celebrate—areas God has moved or been active?

·      What still remains unfinished or unanswered?

For some, this may bring natural gratitude and worship for all that God has done. For others, the past year carries loss, questions, or even regret.

What stands out to you about last year?

One of my favorite poets, George Herbert, an Anglican Priest in the 17th century, wrote a beautiful poem wrestling with his thoughts as a priest going into the new year.

It’s called “The Collar” because that is what a priest wore in his service—a collar around his neck—and for Herbert this was a symbol and image of his year. 

He wrestles with freedom and responsibility. With God’s promises and potential. The limited harvest of his ministry and his life. And begins to face his own limitations too.

Herbert wrestles with who God is, how God works, his own purpose, and most deeply His heart with the Lord. 

He asks God honestly, “Is the year only loss to me?”

You’ll find him realizing at the end, that his emotions and wrestling were really a sort of lament. 

And he comes as a child before His Dad, “as I…grew more fierce, I heard one calling “Child,” and I replied, “My Lord.”

So take a moment this New Year and reflect with George and Jesus,

I struck the board, and cried, "No more;

                         I will abroad!

What? shall I ever sigh and pine?

My lines and life are free, free as the road,

Loose as the wind, as large as store.

          Shall I be still in suit?

Have I no harvest but a thorn

To let me blood, and not restore

What I have lost with cordial fruit?

          Sure there was wine

Before my sighs did dry it; there was corn

    Before my tears did drown it.

      Is the year only lost to me?

          Have I no bays to crown it,

No flowers, no garlands gay? All blasted?

                  All wasted?

Not so, my heart; but there is fruit,

            And thou hast hands.

Recover all thy sigh-blown age

On double pleasures: leave thy cold dispute

Of what is fit and not. Forsake thy cage,

             Thy rope of sands,

Which petty thoughts have made, and made to thee

Good cable, to enforce and draw,

          And be thy law,

While thou didst wink and wouldst not see.

          Away! take heed;

          I will abroad.

Call in thy death's-head there; tie up thy fears;

          He that forbears

         To suit and serve his need

          Deserves his load."

But as I raved and grew more fierce and wild

          At every word,

Methought I heard one calling, Child!

          And I replied My Lord.

I love that in the midst of his “ravings” of legitimate questions, doubts, and inner movements, He gets a nudge from the Holy Spirit—“child!”  And his immediate heart response is “My Lord.”

 It’s so telling, because, in one sense, we recognize that in comparison to all that Herbert was saying beforehand—that God's voice is way more important. That One voice is so powerful and subtle that it stops all the momentum of his roving thoughts.

And it's easy to conclude that Herbert's thoughts were unimportant, irrelevant, or wasted.

But, I’d like us to consider, what if Herbert hadn’t gone into that place where He wrestled and processed and poured his heart out before the Lord?

What if he wasn’t in that open, heart-pumping, existential place with God where those very real questions bubbled up to the surface of his heart?

·      Would he have heard that voice?

·      Would he have noticed that nudge?

·      Would he have known the obvious difference between the voice of God and his own?

Hebrews 5:13-14 says, “Solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.”

How do we grow in discernment, how do we train to hear the voice of God over and against our how?

By practice. Constant practice.

I’d suggest that George Herbert, in the Collar, was putting in full-color the display of discernment training needed to distinguish good from evil. To distinguish God from ourselves.

·      Where do you need to hear from God this year?

·      What is on your heart? Your area where you want Him to show up?

Likely you’ll need to open your heart before the Lord like George did.

“Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us,” (Psalm 62:8).

What would it be like to begin spilling just a drop or two of your heart before the Lord right now?

If this feels difficult, use this resource below to Write Your New Year's Prayer and take a deeper step with the Lord this New Year.

See you Sunday!

Pastor Dave

Resource

Write Your New Year's Prayer - take a 5-15 minutes to spend time with God and enter into this intentional reflection on your previous year, your heart, your needs, and who God is. Then spend some time talking to Him about your upcoming year, listening to His voice, and rooting your heart in His character. What a wonderful way to start 2024.